The bad news is that my last week was a bit of a whirlwind, so I completely neglected the blog. The good news is that you'll be able to get a double dose of "Where Are They Now?" beginning with Ben Spendlove. Ben and I have been critique partners for going on six years, so DRIVERS was one of the few entries I got to read in its entirety. Ben's writing never ceases to blow me away, and the insights he shares below are just as keen.
KV: One of the things I loved most about DRIVERS was how it felt like a book that only you could write. What inspired you to write it?
BS: My first conception of DRIVERS was quite different from what I ended up writing; the protagonist was an investigative reporter who suspected an unmanned-ground-drone maker of actually putting people inside the drones. I work at a company that automates vehicles, so I knew a lot about the subject. In that form, however, it would have been more of a detective story.
As I worked it over in my mind, I was drawn more to the characters inside the drones. What would make someone voluntarily hide inside a robot that was likely to be destroyed? The answer, at least for me, was that they wanted to die. And I understood them, having gone through periods of depression and suicide attempts.
It became deeply personal, with the technology, setting, and action as a metaphor for exploring depression and suicide. These subjects are often misunderstood and stigmatized, so I wanted to show, metaphorically, what it was like. I tried to use my inside knowledge of how autonomous vehicles work to make it plausible and realistic.
KV: As one of your critique partners, I know that your writing has sometimes had to take a backseat to the rest of your life. What makes you keep coming back to it?
BS: I believe that everyone has a creative impulse. For me, it's strong. And though I like other creative endeavors, like rebuilding bicycles, I always come back to writing--and I always have. Writing gives me a positive place for my thoughts to dwell instead of worrying about what terrible things might happen in real life. It helps me sort through my experiences and emotions. On days that I write, I'm more focused at work and happier at home.
Last summer, I had a run-in with depression for the first time in over ten years. I'd thought I was done with depression, immune for life. But there it was. I turned to my writing, both what I'd written in DRIVERS and a new novel, to explore the aspects of my life that didn't feel right. Writing isn't a cure for depression; it can sometimes make it worse! But it can also help, and it has. (In fact, this last year has made me grateful that I don't have a publisher or even an agent. I don't have deadlines or commitments to deal with.)
Another draw is the love I develop for my characters and stories. I want them to reach their potential, and as long as I still have ideas for making them better, I'll keep revising. I tend not to have a lot of stories in my head waiting to be written, but I certainly have lots of ideas about the ones I'm working on.
KV: A few years ago, your wife wood-burned an Isaac Asimov quote on a pencil: "I write for the same reason I breathe--because if I didn't, I would die." What do those words mean to you?
BS: I won't literally die without writing, but if I go too long without working on a novel, it feels like I'm dying. I feel directionless. Life seems futile. I think I was born to write stories. (It's probably pathological.)
Writing is also my preferred method of communication with myself. I write notes--a lot--to help me figure things out. My day job is technical writing, so I do a lot of less-creative writing, too. (Engineers occasionally comment about how awful my job seems to them. And I'm always like "Right back at ya!")
You know, I guess I don't know that I wouldn't literally die, because I've never actually stopped writing. Hmm.
KV: What are you working on now?
BS: I'm almost embarrassed to admit that I'm still working on DRIVERS. After The Writer's Voice and querying about fifty agents, I set it aside and wrote another novel, THE FREEZER, which was difficult to write and took much longer. (No luck getting an agent there, either.) Then I started a middle grade novel, but couldn't get momentum. Then I started another sci-fi novel, which I love and intend to finish.
But last year when I opened DRIVERS and read the entire thing--I still loved it. That's got to count for something. I knew if I were to give it another go, I'd need some fresh eyes and ideas. So I swallowed my pride and gave everyone at work and all my Facebook friends the chance to read it. And I got some good feedback. Then one of my coworkers approached me about starting a writing group, and we've been workshopping DRIVERS a chapter at a time.
Now I'm working on some exciting changes to the setting, the ending, and the secondary characters, including (wait for it) making one of the drivers an investigative reporter. I'm also bringing in other motivations for the drivers, because there are many reasons to put oneself in mortal danger. I'm not sticking slavishly to my depression metaphor anymore, and I think the story is better for it.
KV: Any last words of advice or encouragement you'd like to share with us?
BS: My daughter is my role model when it comes to writing. She reads voraciously and writes prodigiously. As much as I profess to love reading and writing, I don't do either very much. She spends a good chunk of her free time (and more of her non-free time than I'd like) reading and writing. And you know what? She's really good at both of them. Once she learns to revise, she'll write better than I do.
I guess I'm saying that the standard advice about writing is good advice. I'm trying to take it and fit writing into my day wherever I can--even if I have to give up some precious sleep.
Thank you for your honesty and authenticity, Ben. I'm sure I'm not the only one who has grown and will grow from the words you add to the world.
Monday, March 28, 2016
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
Mr. Taylor Has Picked His Winner
And it's #10 THE COUNTLESS THREADS OF RAE JULY!
Mr. Taylor would like to read your full, so please send it to him at brent(at)triadaus(dot)com. Fingers crossed!
Thank you to our awesome agent for his helpful feedback and to everyone who entered, commented, or participated in any way. You guys are pretty great.
Mr. Taylor would like to read your full, so please send it to him at brent(at)triadaus(dot)com. Fingers crossed!
Thank you to our awesome agent for his helpful feedback and to everyone who entered, commented, or participated in any way. You guys are pretty great.
Wednesday, March 16, 2016
"An Agent's Inbox" Returns!
Check out the entries below, then leave some feedback in the comments if you feel so inclined. (ENTRANTS, PLEASE REMEMBER TO CRITIQUE AT LEAST THREE OTHER ENTRIES!) And I'm sure this goes without saying, but please keep your comments constructive (i.e., not rude or mean-spirited). If you want to think like The Agent, you might consider the question, "How much of the entry did you read, and if you didn't read it all, why did you stop?"
I'll announce Mr. Taylor's winners and prizes at the beginning of next week, but until then, have at it!
(Also, just so you're aware, I always take out profanity when I'm formatting the entries. In other words, any asterisks you see in the entries are mine, so you don't need to point them out to the entrants. I just prefer to keep things as PG-rated as possible on the blog.
Last but not least, entrants, if you find a Krista-generated error in your post, feel free to shoot me an e-mail, and I'll correct it straightaway.)
I'll announce Mr. Taylor's winners and prizes at the beginning of next week, but until then, have at it!
(Also, just so you're aware, I always take out profanity when I'm formatting the entries. In other words, any asterisks you see in the entries are mine, so you don't need to point them out to the entrants. I just prefer to keep things as PG-rated as possible on the blog.
Last but not least, entrants, if you find a Krista-generated error in your post, feel free to shoot me an e-mail, and I'll correct it straightaway.)
An Agent's Inbox #21
Dear Mr. Taylor,
I read in your 2016 #MSWL that you're looking for YA Fantasy with powerful and searing voice. With that in mind, I'd love for you to take a look at my YA fantasy novel, BLOOD OF ASGARD.
Most teens spend their high school years trying to fit in, Raven spends hers trying not to kill anyone...again.
With an uncontrollable power to manipulate the elements through her emotions, seventeen-year-old Raven Lundberg has worked hard to feel, well, nothing. Her only comforts are vacations spent in Norway with her mom and grandma.
But when Grandma goes missing and Mom literally fades to nothing before her eyes, Raven learns the impossible: her family’s disappearance is the first sign of Ragnarok, signaling the end of the world. Now she must travel back in time to the brutal Viking Era to save her ancestor and stop Loki, the trickster god, from invoking the other events of Ragnarok.
When her ancestor’s Viking village is attacked by The Midgard Serpent, Raven must team up with the local blacksmith, Kol, to set a trap and kill the beast. The more time Raven spends with Kol, the more torn she is about going back to her own time when her mission is over. But in the world of the Norse, the line between hero and villain is much more muddled than she ever realized, and although Raven is willing to die to save her family, her life may not be the only one she must sacrifice if she’s going to save the world.
BLOOD OF ASGARD, complete at 86,000 words, will appeal to the many fans of the hit show Vikings and Rick Riordan’s newest series, MAGNUS CHASE.
I live in Chandler, Arizona, with my husband, four kids, two dogs, and cat. I’m a member of the American Night Writer’s Association and have served on the board of directors and as conference committee chair. With a passion for history and archeology, I traveled to Norway for the research of this novel.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Cheers,
T.S.B.
BLOOD OF ASGARD
Chapter 1: Huginn & Muninn
When I was thirteen, I killed a man with a lightning strike. That’s when I knew I was different, and dangerous. Since then I’ve made changes to keep everyone around me safe, because if I allow myself to feel--to get worked up and emotional--bad things happen.
So, today, like always, I sit in the center of the crowded lunch room, feeling utterly alone. The combined smells of various different foods and teenage bodies in one area turns my hunger to nausea. I pick at my apple with no intentions of eating it. Loud conversations echo off the linoleum floors: a white noise of high school gossip interrupted only by the occasional bark of laughter. I know everyone’s name and they know mine. I eat with them at lunch, see them in class, exchange smiles, and sometimes even the occasional small talk, but that’s the most I can offer. Because there is no place more full of drama than high school, and with drama comes heightened emotions, which for me, equals danger. High school is basically the worst place for me to be.
A hand waves in front of my face. It has orange cheese bits stuck to the finger tips and smells like Cheetos. “Raven! Hel-lo, earth to Raven,” Sarah from my math class says from beside me. “Did you hear anything I just said?”
I usually get through lunch with only a few hi’s and how are you’s.
I read in your 2016 #MSWL that you're looking for YA Fantasy with powerful and searing voice. With that in mind, I'd love for you to take a look at my YA fantasy novel, BLOOD OF ASGARD.
Most teens spend their high school years trying to fit in, Raven spends hers trying not to kill anyone...again.
With an uncontrollable power to manipulate the elements through her emotions, seventeen-year-old Raven Lundberg has worked hard to feel, well, nothing. Her only comforts are vacations spent in Norway with her mom and grandma.
But when Grandma goes missing and Mom literally fades to nothing before her eyes, Raven learns the impossible: her family’s disappearance is the first sign of Ragnarok, signaling the end of the world. Now she must travel back in time to the brutal Viking Era to save her ancestor and stop Loki, the trickster god, from invoking the other events of Ragnarok.
When her ancestor’s Viking village is attacked by The Midgard Serpent, Raven must team up with the local blacksmith, Kol, to set a trap and kill the beast. The more time Raven spends with Kol, the more torn she is about going back to her own time when her mission is over. But in the world of the Norse, the line between hero and villain is much more muddled than she ever realized, and although Raven is willing to die to save her family, her life may not be the only one she must sacrifice if she’s going to save the world.
BLOOD OF ASGARD, complete at 86,000 words, will appeal to the many fans of the hit show Vikings and Rick Riordan’s newest series, MAGNUS CHASE.
I live in Chandler, Arizona, with my husband, four kids, two dogs, and cat. I’m a member of the American Night Writer’s Association and have served on the board of directors and as conference committee chair. With a passion for history and archeology, I traveled to Norway for the research of this novel.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Cheers,
T.S.B.
BLOOD OF ASGARD
Chapter 1: Huginn & Muninn
When I was thirteen, I killed a man with a lightning strike. That’s when I knew I was different, and dangerous. Since then I’ve made changes to keep everyone around me safe, because if I allow myself to feel--to get worked up and emotional--bad things happen.
So, today, like always, I sit in the center of the crowded lunch room, feeling utterly alone. The combined smells of various different foods and teenage bodies in one area turns my hunger to nausea. I pick at my apple with no intentions of eating it. Loud conversations echo off the linoleum floors: a white noise of high school gossip interrupted only by the occasional bark of laughter. I know everyone’s name and they know mine. I eat with them at lunch, see them in class, exchange smiles, and sometimes even the occasional small talk, but that’s the most I can offer. Because there is no place more full of drama than high school, and with drama comes heightened emotions, which for me, equals danger. High school is basically the worst place for me to be.
A hand waves in front of my face. It has orange cheese bits stuck to the finger tips and smells like Cheetos. “Raven! Hel-lo, earth to Raven,” Sarah from my math class says from beside me. “Did you hear anything I just said?”
I usually get through lunch with only a few hi’s and how are you’s.
An Agent's Inbox #20
Dear Mr. Taylor,
Being tortured is just another day for Brynlee Williams.
When sixteen-year-old Brynlee got sent to the Pit as punishment for criticizing the Lords to their face, she never thought brutal interrogation would be part of that castigation. But there she was, trapped under the correctional institution she was sent to for creating chaos at the annual Lords Parade, being asked about a resistance she knows nothing about, and wondering if she’ll ever see the sun again. But when said rebels free the institution, Brynlee joins them without a second thought. After all, any chance of getting rid of the Lords is anything she can get behind.
Brynlee immediately join ranks with them and is trained by the infuriatingly calm Travis Hawley, the resistance’s top-ranked soldier. But when her first rescue operation sends her back home, Brynlee gets the worst news of her life in the form of discovering that her family was killed by order of the Lords in penance for her joining the resistance. But Brynlee has no time to grieve. She teams up with a group of genetically altered kids called the Genesis Projects and, together, they work to liberate the institutions where kids are being held for treasonous acts against the Lords. But the Lords beat them to the institutions and destroy them before they can even reach them.
During one of these missions, Brynlee loses her only friend and, in the same day, is given the news that her brother is still alive but being held prisoner in the Lords Tower in the Capital City. After she’s told that the rebels have no intention of saving him, Brynlee and Travis devise their own plan to get him. But before they find him, Brynlee is captured by the leader of the Genesis Council and is faced with the choice of being either experimented on or facing her execution, so she makes a decision that will change her entire life as she knows it.
CAGED is a young adult science fiction novel completed at 69,000 words with series potential.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
S.L.
CAGED
The Pit was the worst place to end up. Anyone who had ever been thrown in it usually came out either insane or dead. I planned on being neither.
Six months ago, my friends and I were shipped to a correctional institution for treasonous children. Anyone between the ages of eight to seventeen got shipped there if they were considered traitors.
I was thrown in the Pit four months ago when the leaders of our country did their annual visit to the school. I had said some rather choice words and was immediately seized and thrown down there.
The Pit wasn’t some massive hole under the institution. Well, it was and it wasn’t.
There were no windows and no lights. It was a labyrinth of cells, all six feet long and four feet wide. They were big enough for a small cot and a toilet. The walls and floors were made of stone that were always wet. Where the water came from, I couldn’t say. It was just always there.
The only time I saw light was when a Guard brought me food. Occasionally, I got treated to a whole room full of light when they dragged me from my cell and hauled to me a room where they tried to get information out of me. But I had nothing to tell them even if I wanted to. No matter how many times I screamed that I knew nothing, they didn’t hear it.
Being tortured is just another day for Brynlee Williams.
When sixteen-year-old Brynlee got sent to the Pit as punishment for criticizing the Lords to their face, she never thought brutal interrogation would be part of that castigation. But there she was, trapped under the correctional institution she was sent to for creating chaos at the annual Lords Parade, being asked about a resistance she knows nothing about, and wondering if she’ll ever see the sun again. But when said rebels free the institution, Brynlee joins them without a second thought. After all, any chance of getting rid of the Lords is anything she can get behind.
Brynlee immediately join ranks with them and is trained by the infuriatingly calm Travis Hawley, the resistance’s top-ranked soldier. But when her first rescue operation sends her back home, Brynlee gets the worst news of her life in the form of discovering that her family was killed by order of the Lords in penance for her joining the resistance. But Brynlee has no time to grieve. She teams up with a group of genetically altered kids called the Genesis Projects and, together, they work to liberate the institutions where kids are being held for treasonous acts against the Lords. But the Lords beat them to the institutions and destroy them before they can even reach them.
During one of these missions, Brynlee loses her only friend and, in the same day, is given the news that her brother is still alive but being held prisoner in the Lords Tower in the Capital City. After she’s told that the rebels have no intention of saving him, Brynlee and Travis devise their own plan to get him. But before they find him, Brynlee is captured by the leader of the Genesis Council and is faced with the choice of being either experimented on or facing her execution, so she makes a decision that will change her entire life as she knows it.
CAGED is a young adult science fiction novel completed at 69,000 words with series potential.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
S.L.
CAGED
The Pit was the worst place to end up. Anyone who had ever been thrown in it usually came out either insane or dead. I planned on being neither.
Six months ago, my friends and I were shipped to a correctional institution for treasonous children. Anyone between the ages of eight to seventeen got shipped there if they were considered traitors.
I was thrown in the Pit four months ago when the leaders of our country did their annual visit to the school. I had said some rather choice words and was immediately seized and thrown down there.
The Pit wasn’t some massive hole under the institution. Well, it was and it wasn’t.
There were no windows and no lights. It was a labyrinth of cells, all six feet long and four feet wide. They were big enough for a small cot and a toilet. The walls and floors were made of stone that were always wet. Where the water came from, I couldn’t say. It was just always there.
The only time I saw light was when a Guard brought me food. Occasionally, I got treated to a whole room full of light when they dragged me from my cell and hauled to me a room where they tried to get information out of me. But I had nothing to tell them even if I wanted to. No matter how many times I screamed that I knew nothing, they didn’t hear it.
An Agent's Inbox #19
Dear Mr. Taylor,
I have read that you are interested in stories about "finding [one's] place in the world" and SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING, a coming of age YA novel, complete at 92,000 words, is this kind of book.
Sixteen-year-old Alice Burton loves school, lacrosse and her two best friends (who can’t stand each other). But when her mother, a wannabe health-food guru, concocts a diet shake that may be more than a fad, Alice surprises everyone by shedding her lingering baby fat to reveal an eye-catching body that changes everything. On one hand, her dad, a local celebrity radio personality, keeps telling her to cover-up. On the other hand, she doesn’t mind hot, twenty-something Chris Thompson taking notice. The intensity of her desire to be with Chris, preferably naked, is new to her. She doesn’t have long to process these feelings before she discovers that her dad has gambled away the tuition for her beloved private school. Devastated by this betrayal but distracted by thoughts of Chris, Alice’s life is further complicated when she realizes her education is now dependent on the generosity of a friend of her father’s, a lecherous major league baseball player. Alienated from her family and her friends, Alice must find a way to protect her body, her tuition money, her future and her heart.
SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING deals with body image, celebrity culture before paparazzi, and unrequited love that isn’t what it seems. Set in the 1990s Pittsburgh rock-and-roll bar scene, it’s the forbidden attraction of Dirty Dancing mixed with a heavy dose of The Smith’s brooding introspection. Reminiscent of Blake Nelson’s GIRL and DREAM SCHOOL, SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING explores the complexities that arise when the adult male gaze shifts a young girl’s perception of herself and the world around her.
This is my first novel. I have a degree in English from George Mason University and I majored in Fiction Writing at the Pennsylvania Governor's School for the Arts. When I’m not writing, I work in the admission office of a private school where I talk to high school students every day about books they love and issues that are important to them.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
J.B.C.
SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING
JUNE, 1992
Monday – 9:18 a.m.
“He’s been looking for you,” one of the secretaries says.
I’ve just stepped into the lobby of the radio station and a blast of cold air hits me from the AC. I can’t remember her name, and how can I be expected to? She is alone behind the desk, which is odd, because there’s a usually a coven of them: frosted hair and teased bangs, fishnet tops layered over lace camis, and acid washed jeans skirts left over from the 80s. They take the job hoping they’ll get promoted to DJ, but quit when they can no longer stomach the lewd comments from the actual DJs. I can’t keep the receptionists straight, but they all know who I am: Station Manager Dennis Burton’s daughter.
“Thanks,” I say, with an eye roll, which isn’t directed at her, though she probably thinks it is. I should stop and chat so she doesn’t think I’m a b****, but she’ll probably be gone by the end of the week. And I am 18 minutes late. If I weren’t the boss’ daughter and if this weren’t the 150th(ish) summer I was “working” at the station, it would be a fire-able offense in my dad’s eyes. So I scoot past the reception desk and head towards my dad’s office at the back of the floor. The desks that take up nearly every square inch of the main area are strangely sparsely populated for this time of day.
I have read that you are interested in stories about "finding [one's] place in the world" and SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING, a coming of age YA novel, complete at 92,000 words, is this kind of book.
Sixteen-year-old Alice Burton loves school, lacrosse and her two best friends (who can’t stand each other). But when her mother, a wannabe health-food guru, concocts a diet shake that may be more than a fad, Alice surprises everyone by shedding her lingering baby fat to reveal an eye-catching body that changes everything. On one hand, her dad, a local celebrity radio personality, keeps telling her to cover-up. On the other hand, she doesn’t mind hot, twenty-something Chris Thompson taking notice. The intensity of her desire to be with Chris, preferably naked, is new to her. She doesn’t have long to process these feelings before she discovers that her dad has gambled away the tuition for her beloved private school. Devastated by this betrayal but distracted by thoughts of Chris, Alice’s life is further complicated when she realizes her education is now dependent on the generosity of a friend of her father’s, a lecherous major league baseball player. Alienated from her family and her friends, Alice must find a way to protect her body, her tuition money, her future and her heart.
SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING deals with body image, celebrity culture before paparazzi, and unrequited love that isn’t what it seems. Set in the 1990s Pittsburgh rock-and-roll bar scene, it’s the forbidden attraction of Dirty Dancing mixed with a heavy dose of The Smith’s brooding introspection. Reminiscent of Blake Nelson’s GIRL and DREAM SCHOOL, SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING explores the complexities that arise when the adult male gaze shifts a young girl’s perception of herself and the world around her.
This is my first novel. I have a degree in English from George Mason University and I majored in Fiction Writing at the Pennsylvania Governor's School for the Arts. When I’m not writing, I work in the admission office of a private school where I talk to high school students every day about books they love and issues that are important to them.
Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
J.B.C.
SO MUCH MORE THAN EVERYTHING
JUNE, 1992
Monday – 9:18 a.m.
“He’s been looking for you,” one of the secretaries says.
I’ve just stepped into the lobby of the radio station and a blast of cold air hits me from the AC. I can’t remember her name, and how can I be expected to? She is alone behind the desk, which is odd, because there’s a usually a coven of them: frosted hair and teased bangs, fishnet tops layered over lace camis, and acid washed jeans skirts left over from the 80s. They take the job hoping they’ll get promoted to DJ, but quit when they can no longer stomach the lewd comments from the actual DJs. I can’t keep the receptionists straight, but they all know who I am: Station Manager Dennis Burton’s daughter.
“Thanks,” I say, with an eye roll, which isn’t directed at her, though she probably thinks it is. I should stop and chat so she doesn’t think I’m a b****, but she’ll probably be gone by the end of the week. And I am 18 minutes late. If I weren’t the boss’ daughter and if this weren’t the 150th(ish) summer I was “working” at the station, it would be a fire-able offense in my dad’s eyes. So I scoot past the reception desk and head towards my dad’s office at the back of the floor. The desks that take up nearly every square inch of the main area are strangely sparsely populated for this time of day.
An Agent's Inbox #18
Dear Mr. Taylor,
In the summer of 1914, seven year old Ruchel and her siblings lead a poor but happy life on the far eastern edge of the Austro-Hungarian Empire, but as World War 1 begins, her father is forcibly drafted into the Austrian Army. Three days later, the Russian Army invades, leaving her and her family far behind enemy lines. To survive, they take jobs in a canteen cooking for the occupying Russian soldiers. One of the officers’ pastimes is playing chess. Ruchel learns the game from watching them. When the soldiers leave to join the rest of the army fighting the Germans to the north, the family converts the canteen into a restaurant, hoping to stay in business by catering to the locals.
Unfortunately, the Ukrainians and the Poles don’t particularly like Jews, and the other Jews fear being near anything once associated with the hated Russian Army. So even though her mother is an excellent cook, business is terrible until Ruchel challenges and defeats a customer in a chess match. Local chess players start coming to play her, others come just to see her play and beat much older men. Slowly, the family’s fortunes begin to improve, but then the Austrian Army marches back in, soon to be followed by the Russian counterattack. As each side repeatedly conquers their homeland, Ruchel and her family find themselves in a desperate battle for survival as food becomes so scarce they are eventually forced to hunt rats.
Finally, as the Central Powers collapse, civil war rages across the territory as both the Ukrainians and Poles battle for control, with both sides attacking their Jewish population. Gambling on a chance to leave, the family will bet their life savings against immigration papers on Ruchel beating a Polish chess champion.
The Chess Girl is a 66,000 word middle grade historical novel based on my Grandmother’s life growing up in what is now part of the Ukraine. While a novel, it is interwoven with the family history of how she and her siblings survived WW1, and how all but one of them eventually escaped to the United States before the Holocaust.
Below are the first 250 words. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
B.L.
THE CHESS GIRL
Chapter 1: The Final Match
Ruchel’s opponent carefully pushed his knight two spaces forward and one space left using the two fingers remaining on his right hand. He nodded to Ruchel as he pulled his hand back. The burned side of his face remained frozen, as did the milky white eye contained within, but the other side of his mouth tried to turn upward.
Once, Ruchel would have felt both pity and horror at his appearance, but she’d seen so many ruined men in the last couple of years. Besides, the stakes were too high. The fat constable by the window kept playing with the holster around his waist, grunting every so often just in case she hadn’t noticed him. “Pig,” she mumbled in Yiddish. She quickly looked away. If he realized what she’d said, it wouldn’t matter who won this game. Fortunately, he was focused on the shopkeeper across the street struggling to remount his store’s smashed in window frame. The smile on his face made her say pig again, but this time only to herself.
The Assistant Secretary to the Deputy Administrator of the Lwow Voivodship stood impolitely close to the playing table just behind her opponent. Occasionally he leaned in close, pretending to peer at the board but really just trying to intimidate her. Even if she did win, would it matter, or would they just be cheated again? She heard a ‘hmm’ further behind her, the priest from the local Eastern Orthodox church. The Rabbi had wisely invited him. The secretary stepped ever so slightly back.
In the summer of 1914, seven year old Ruchel and her siblings lead a poor but happy life on the far eastern edge of the Austro-Hungarian Empire, but as World War 1 begins, her father is forcibly drafted into the Austrian Army. Three days later, the Russian Army invades, leaving her and her family far behind enemy lines. To survive, they take jobs in a canteen cooking for the occupying Russian soldiers. One of the officers’ pastimes is playing chess. Ruchel learns the game from watching them. When the soldiers leave to join the rest of the army fighting the Germans to the north, the family converts the canteen into a restaurant, hoping to stay in business by catering to the locals.
Unfortunately, the Ukrainians and the Poles don’t particularly like Jews, and the other Jews fear being near anything once associated with the hated Russian Army. So even though her mother is an excellent cook, business is terrible until Ruchel challenges and defeats a customer in a chess match. Local chess players start coming to play her, others come just to see her play and beat much older men. Slowly, the family’s fortunes begin to improve, but then the Austrian Army marches back in, soon to be followed by the Russian counterattack. As each side repeatedly conquers their homeland, Ruchel and her family find themselves in a desperate battle for survival as food becomes so scarce they are eventually forced to hunt rats.
Finally, as the Central Powers collapse, civil war rages across the territory as both the Ukrainians and Poles battle for control, with both sides attacking their Jewish population. Gambling on a chance to leave, the family will bet their life savings against immigration papers on Ruchel beating a Polish chess champion.
The Chess Girl is a 66,000 word middle grade historical novel based on my Grandmother’s life growing up in what is now part of the Ukraine. While a novel, it is interwoven with the family history of how she and her siblings survived WW1, and how all but one of them eventually escaped to the United States before the Holocaust.
Below are the first 250 words. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely,
B.L.
THE CHESS GIRL
Chapter 1: The Final Match
Ruchel’s opponent carefully pushed his knight two spaces forward and one space left using the two fingers remaining on his right hand. He nodded to Ruchel as he pulled his hand back. The burned side of his face remained frozen, as did the milky white eye contained within, but the other side of his mouth tried to turn upward.
Once, Ruchel would have felt both pity and horror at his appearance, but she’d seen so many ruined men in the last couple of years. Besides, the stakes were too high. The fat constable by the window kept playing with the holster around his waist, grunting every so often just in case she hadn’t noticed him. “Pig,” she mumbled in Yiddish. She quickly looked away. If he realized what she’d said, it wouldn’t matter who won this game. Fortunately, he was focused on the shopkeeper across the street struggling to remount his store’s smashed in window frame. The smile on his face made her say pig again, but this time only to herself.
The Assistant Secretary to the Deputy Administrator of the Lwow Voivodship stood impolitely close to the playing table just behind her opponent. Occasionally he leaned in close, pretending to peer at the board but really just trying to intimidate her. Even if she did win, would it matter, or would they just be cheated again? She heard a ‘hmm’ further behind her, the priest from the local Eastern Orthodox church. The Rabbi had wisely invited him. The secretary stepped ever so slightly back.
An Agent's Inbox #17
Dear Brent Taylor:
DAMAGED GOODS, a contemporary young adult novel, is complete at 71,000 words.
Sixteen-year-old Justin Marshall has caused trouble for years, but he never expected his father to kick him out of the house.When Justin is sent to live with a grandmother he can’t remember, he vows to escape. Leaving becomes difficult, however, when he realizes that Margaret suffers from dementia and needs his help.
Dad has always been all talk, no action, so Justin is shocked and outraged when he is sent to live with a grandmother he doesn’t remember. Physically deserted by his mother and emotionally abandoned by his father, Justin can’t imagine caring about an old woman. He plans to keep his praying, cussing, Star Wars quoting, cat-loving grandmother at a distance. He is surprised to discover that his usual ways of interacting with adults--brooding, sarcasm, and ridicule--do not bring about the typical reaction from Margaret. His grandmother possesses a healthy sense of humor and a strength that matches his own. She defends him against Dad’s constant criticism, cooks his favorite meals, and shares his love of music. As he begins to bond with Margaret, however, he realizes that she suffers from dementia. Justin knows that if people in her small southwest Oklahoma town discover her impaired memory, he will be unable to stay with her. As her illness progresses, keeping her memory loss a secret becomes increasingly difficult, and his patience and problem-solving abilities are challenged. Justin must decide whether to run from the situation or take care of his grandmother.
I have been writing for most of my life, and my stories, poems, and essays have been published in over twenty magazines. For a year, I wrote feature articles for a weekly newspaper, and many years ago I published a middle grade novel. After raising three children and enjoying a teaching career, I now write almost exclusively for children. Middle grade and young adult fiction are my strongest interests. I participate in a critique group and I’m an active volunteer in SCBWI.
J.A.H.
DAMAGED GOODS
Blue elastic waist pants cover my grandmother’s flat butt, and her flowered shirt screams Old Lady Special. She’s definitely a Wal-martian, even though I haven’t seen a Wally World since we left the interstate an hour ago. That’s how far we are from civilization.
Wooden steps groan as I follow her up to the porch. I drop my suitcases and backpack onto decaying, splintered boards. A scraggly plant has pushed its way through a crack but now droops with exhaustion near my feet.
When Dad told me I’d be living with his mother, I figured it would be a nice house. Not as big or new as his, maybe, but nice. This looks like the kind of place with a meth lab in the kitchen.
It’s daytime, but a porch light has been left on. One of the glass panes around the bulb is broken. Under it, a faded sign reads “Beware! Guard Cat on Duty.”
My grandmother turns toward me and beams. Her eyes--green like Dad’s--study me through red framed glasses. “Welcome to Meow Manor, Justin.”
Her laugh is almost a cackle. A chill creeps over me, even though it’s warm for October and I’m wearing a hoodie.
I can’t live in a shack in Red Dirt, Oklahoma with an old woman I don’t remember. I’ve got to get out of here.
While my grandmother digs in her supersized red purse and mutters about keys, I check out other houses on the block.
DAMAGED GOODS, a contemporary young adult novel, is complete at 71,000 words.
Sixteen-year-old Justin Marshall has caused trouble for years, but he never expected his father to kick him out of the house.When Justin is sent to live with a grandmother he can’t remember, he vows to escape. Leaving becomes difficult, however, when he realizes that Margaret suffers from dementia and needs his help.
Dad has always been all talk, no action, so Justin is shocked and outraged when he is sent to live with a grandmother he doesn’t remember. Physically deserted by his mother and emotionally abandoned by his father, Justin can’t imagine caring about an old woman. He plans to keep his praying, cussing, Star Wars quoting, cat-loving grandmother at a distance. He is surprised to discover that his usual ways of interacting with adults--brooding, sarcasm, and ridicule--do not bring about the typical reaction from Margaret. His grandmother possesses a healthy sense of humor and a strength that matches his own. She defends him against Dad’s constant criticism, cooks his favorite meals, and shares his love of music. As he begins to bond with Margaret, however, he realizes that she suffers from dementia. Justin knows that if people in her small southwest Oklahoma town discover her impaired memory, he will be unable to stay with her. As her illness progresses, keeping her memory loss a secret becomes increasingly difficult, and his patience and problem-solving abilities are challenged. Justin must decide whether to run from the situation or take care of his grandmother.
I have been writing for most of my life, and my stories, poems, and essays have been published in over twenty magazines. For a year, I wrote feature articles for a weekly newspaper, and many years ago I published a middle grade novel. After raising three children and enjoying a teaching career, I now write almost exclusively for children. Middle grade and young adult fiction are my strongest interests. I participate in a critique group and I’m an active volunteer in SCBWI.
J.A.H.
DAMAGED GOODS
Blue elastic waist pants cover my grandmother’s flat butt, and her flowered shirt screams Old Lady Special. She’s definitely a Wal-martian, even though I haven’t seen a Wally World since we left the interstate an hour ago. That’s how far we are from civilization.
Wooden steps groan as I follow her up to the porch. I drop my suitcases and backpack onto decaying, splintered boards. A scraggly plant has pushed its way through a crack but now droops with exhaustion near my feet.
When Dad told me I’d be living with his mother, I figured it would be a nice house. Not as big or new as his, maybe, but nice. This looks like the kind of place with a meth lab in the kitchen.
It’s daytime, but a porch light has been left on. One of the glass panes around the bulb is broken. Under it, a faded sign reads “Beware! Guard Cat on Duty.”
My grandmother turns toward me and beams. Her eyes--green like Dad’s--study me through red framed glasses. “Welcome to Meow Manor, Justin.”
Her laugh is almost a cackle. A chill creeps over me, even though it’s warm for October and I’m wearing a hoodie.
I can’t live in a shack in Red Dirt, Oklahoma with an old woman I don’t remember. I’ve got to get out of here.
While my grandmother digs in her supersized red purse and mutters about keys, I check out other houses on the block.
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