Pages

Monday, May 20, 2013

Team Krista #1: DEATH AND THE GLASSMAKER'S DAUGHTER

Title: DEATH AND THE GLASSMAKER’S DAUGHTER
Genre: YA historical fantasy
Word count: 67,000

Query:

As the son of Death, Moriarty was raised believing in the beauty of ending a life. Then he takes over his father’s work and finds that ripping souls from mortal bodies is nothing like the stories that populated his childhood. It’s violent and bloody, and with imperialism, labor strikes, and people's revolutions leaving corpses around the world, Moriarty can’t find anything to love in his new work.

Until he meets his next victim: Rocsanne Vetrario, the bold, bohemian daughter of Venetian glaziers. Instead of ending her life, Moriarty accidentally saves it, thus kindling a friendship that tumbles into love amid the canals of 1890s Venice.

But their summer together shatters when Moriarty learns that Rocsanne’s stepmother Lavinia is on a crusade to recover the lost secrets of Venetian glass and its power to bestow immortality. When Lavinia discovers her daughter’s romance with the soul collector himself, she threatens to kill Rocsanne unless Moriarty helps her retrieve a piece of the legendary glass. 

Surrendering the glass will give Lavinia control over Moriarty and his work, but if Rocsanne dies, he’ll lose her forever to the afterlife. With Lavinia holding Rocsanne hostage on the cemetery island of San Michele, Moriarty has to choose between his own freedom and the only girl who ever loved Death.

First page:

The first thing he noticed was the rain.

Moriarty had never felt rain before. It didn’t rain in the Greylands, nor did the brushed-black sky wink with tiny pinpricks of light, like jewels floating in a glassy lake. Even the sky itself was new--there was no sky in the Greylands.

But the rain was the first and most marvelous thing--the way it felt against his skin, each drop unexpected and ephemeral. 

Yes, Moriarty decided. I like the rain best.

Hector hadn’t told him about the rain. But Hector had hardly told him anything about the humans, or mortality, or the work he’d be doing, the work that used to be Hector’s. Though they had never discussed it, Moriarty had always known that someday, Hector would grow weary of soul collecting, and the work would pass to him. Father to son.

He had not expected it to be this sudden.

Moriarty looked down at his hands. In each, he clutched one of Hector’s two parting gifts, the only tools of his trade. The first was a heavy brass compass with a blank face and a black hand, shivering but steady as it pointed him ahead into the night. Pressing the face once had brought him to mortality, and twice would take him back to the Greylands when he was finished. The second was a colorless glass amulet streaked with red, which Hector had promised would keep him invisible to all humans but the one he sought.

20 comments:

  1. This is gorgeous, just GORGEOUS. I love the setting, I love your writing... well done! Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow! There's some absolutely beautiful writing here! Your first line drew me right in. I don't read a lot of historical fantasy, but this premise is so unique -- it's definitely something I'd pick up! Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  3. This sounds like a book I just wouldn't be able to put down if I got my hands on it. Your voice and your query are superb! Love it! Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  4. You had me at "friendship that tumbles into love amid the canals of 1890s Venice." Lovely! And your opening page fulfills that promise. Beautiful work. Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  5. There's such beautiful writing here! It just drew me in immediately. And oh, the setting in 1890s Venice! This sounds enthralling. Best of luck in the contest, and go Team Krista!

    ReplyDelete
  6. You paint such vivid pictures with your words - "It didn’t rain in the Greylands, nor did the brushed-black sky wink with tiny pinpricks of light, like jewels floating in a glassy lake." It's delicious, really! Such a fantastic concept - your query is tight and your voice in your first 250 are outstanding. Good luck!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. You paint gorgeous descriptions with your words!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm gonna need to pre-order this one now. Thanks. :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Great concept - this is exactly the kind of book I would pick up immediately. Can't wait to see it on the shelf someday soon - good luck!

    ReplyDelete
  10. This is one of the entries that I NEED to read. All the way through, it is just...gold.

    Very excited to see this progress in bookworld :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. BEAUTIFUL writing. I can't wait to read the rest of this!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I have been looking for a big, lush historical novel, and I really like the Venetian glass aspect of this. The Moriarty-as-son-of-Death might make it a bit trickier, but I'd love to take a look and see how it plays out. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Ammi-Joan PaquetteMay 23, 2013 at 7:48 AM

    This has a fabulous voice and tone--I'm completely hooked in by the opener, and love the story concept. I'd love to read on further!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm excited to read this, and glad to request it!

    -Mollie

    ReplyDelete
  15. What a compelling premise. Would love to read on!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I'd love to see this!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Excellent writing. Would like to read more.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Yes for me. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete